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Our Teachers Fucked Us Up. Royally

Jan. 28th, 2006 | 12:57 am
Theme of the Day: apatheticapathetic
Backround Noise: Computer Hum

I'm sitting here at my desk by the really cold wall in my room and I'm seriously starting to think that our teachers fucked us up.

I am completely uninspired, I have no desire to listen to authority, I DESPISE having to work with it, I hate doing work, I want things handed to me on a silver platter, and above all else at times I am completely devoid of an independent thought.

Now, I know that you are wondering how on earth this correlates to my teachers. Here's the deal. My mother never did group work in school. You sat down, shut up and listened to the teacher. You did your work, you got your marks and life went on. Now, my mom is pretty normal. If I had solely been under the tutelage of my mother I would not be the things I listed in the previous paragraph. It is because of my mother that I am not sitting on welfare playing video games.

I BLAME all of this on the EXCEEDING amounts of group work that we did in school. The new wave of the 1980's (and we're still suffering the effects, trust me) was "Let the students create their own learning". Which is basically teachers saying "We're tired and we don't want to teach anymore". Group work taught me 4 things

1)No idea is a good idea if it comes from someone independently
2)Only the popular, pretty people are listened to
3)The somewhat intelligent yet non popular types get stuck doing all the work
4)You only get the partial credit

If you think about it....that's exactly how society exists today.

I want to go back to the good old days. I want to be able to teach history from a lecturn and GODDAMNIT those kids are going to FUCKING know that material or GOD HELP THEM!! I want to be able to conduct a band with my baton in one hand and the STRAP in the other. If you won't respect me then you are going to fear me.

Okay...that's a little harsh I'll admit. But for crying out loud people! I'm in education and I think half of what I'm being taught to teach others is bullshit. Why do I have to do oral presentations on teaching methods? Wasn't my internship ONE BIG FUCKING ORAL PRESENTATION ON TEACHING METHODS?!! I hated having to deal with administration, and I hate having to deal with profs. I don't want to do anymore assignments, because now I am starting to see the college as one big joke.

Group work man. Group work is the devil.

I think that's why I like band. Band is a communist regime. Everyone is equal, because without everyone the group as a whole suffers. Thoughts and opinions are welcome, but in the end the conductor has the final say. What I really like about band as the communist regime is that the conductor/teacher has the ABSOLUTE FINAL say on what goes. Everyone has to follow him (or her). The conductor tells you if you suck, if it's right, if it's not, and occasionally when you are doing a good job. The conductor has the right to tell when to get the fuck out, when to shut the hell up, and when to tell you not come back. Ever.

But I will never have sectionals unless I am running them or someone other than a section leader is running them. Sectionals run by peers constitues group work. And group work is the devil.

Remember that.

However, I will conceed defeat and acknowledge that group work has its place.

But I promise never to inflict it more than twice a semester on my students.

From the editor's desk
Goodnight and Good Luck.

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I hearby propose....

Jan. 17th, 2006 | 12:10 am
Theme of the Day: annoyedannoyed

I don't rant very often. It's been almost three months since I've ranted.

But I now have a high horse I need to get on.

I just read an article in MacLean's Magazine (a news magazine for any non-canucks out there) about the disintergration of marriages and families because of gaming.
It's a Sick Sad World FolksCollapse )

Meh...I should get some sleep...and gear myself up for some election rants.
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Crimes against Humanity vol. 1

Oct. 23rd, 2005 | 02:36 pm
Theme of the Day: contemplativecontemplative
Backround Noise: Computer Noise

These are Crimes Against Humanity that various Baby Boomers have perpetrated. The crime: giving birth to the flakes that have made my generation look vain, ignorant, and generally stupid.

- Britney Spears, Dec. 1981
- Jessica Simpson, July 1980
- Ashlee Simpson, Oct. 1984
- Lindsay Lohan, July 1986
- Hilary Duff, Sept. 1987
- Paris Hilton, Feb. 1981
- Nicole Hilton, Oct. 1983
- Christina Aguilera, Dec. 1980
- Avril Lavigne (I include her because she made punk look bad), Sept. 1984
- Nicole Richie, Sept. 1981

There are MANY MANY more, which I shall post on Crimes Against Humanity vol. 2, but these are the ones that truly deserved to be on the list

The punishment: I'm not so severe as to advocate death (although some of my online counterparts would think that I am much too lenient), but I would suggest a five year long ban against their materials. During that five year ban the above said group can join the school of life (otherwise called the school of hard knocks) to get a clue.

Unfortunately, the main culprit on my list has recently released womb droppings. She is a prime example of one who should not procreate.

Some may suggest that I should have included Katie Holmes on my list, but up until recently I thought the girl did have a clue. I still think she does actually, and that within a few years Tom Cruise will finally come out of the closet, Nicole Kidman will finally say "I told you so" and Katie will walk away from the marriage with an amicable divorce and ten times wealthier than she dreamed she would ever be. The pregnancy (and possible future ones) are the clincher. It's always good to have leverage in a divorce settlement.

Gotta love how I have such high hopes for their future eh?

It's hollywood....nothing's real in tinsle-town.

Hollywood: No clue since 1924

So that wraps up Crimes Against Humanity for now. Vol. 2 should be here the next time I see some fucking little pop-tart shaking her ass on TV and then telling me how I should live my life.

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An Introduction

Oct. 23rd, 2005 | 12:05 am
Theme of the Day: bitchybitchy
Backround Noise: Meaningless TV

So, here I am.

And I'm not too terribly sure what's going to happen next. I do know that I want people to read this. And I know that I want people to contribute. I want this to be a forum for discussion. And when I find people who are just as royally pissed as me some times then they will get the password and they'll get to post.

How does one start a rant? You don't. It just comes to you. Right now all that I am truly upset about is a hockey game that in the grand scheme of things shouldn't be a problem. And I'm thirsty, craving coke and courtesy of my hockey game slurpee, am more awake than I should be.

Slurpee. Not a word in our parents' vocuabulary.

Slurpee. A word our children (or future children) come to know during that pre-natal bliss that is the womb.

Two year olds knocking back slurpees in the oversized stroller built to accomodate them because their parents haven't taught them to walk or toilet train them, so in the process they run to the walmart to change their oversized diapers in the bathrooms, only to discover that the dyes used in the slurpee has turned their shit green. Then they scold the child not being potty trained as they walk down the diaper isle to buy more oversized diapers for their oversized kid who can't even walk on his two legs and still shits his pants.

I hate to say this folks, but I witness crimes like this being committed by my generation. Some days I question whether my generation should actually continue the human race. It's those days that I decide that maybe I should have my tubes tied as a favour to humanity. Some days I don't let it get to me because I believe we are the generation that is going to ROYALLY FUCK THINGS UP. We are going to produce the president who is so ADHD that no drug will subdue him or her, and that shiny red button in the Oval Office is going to be too hard to ignore. We are the Ritalin generation.

Sometimes I hate being a part of my generation. I see them too often fucking things up for the rest of us. But there are moments and people out there who give me hope. I know good people who aren't going screw things up no matter how much they believe they already have. These people may not make a huge impact, but they will help. These people make my generation seem okay. When really....we're in dire straits.

But that's another rant. I'll save it for later.

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